45 Days to Change

On March 1st, I decided I would begin 45 days of yoga. I was to commit to 45 days without missing, if I missed a day, I would have to start over. It was an important day to me because it would have been the birthday of my deceased uncle whom was extremely overweight at death.

March 1st became even more significant, as we found out my father was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer. At the time of diagnoses, the cancer had already spread to his liver, lungs and lymph nodes. With little else to do for him, chemotherapy was the only treatment that could be offered to possibly extend his life another 3 to 5 years.

While I was committing to a challenge that would add something to my life, my father was facing a challenge that would be taking something from him. But we were both optimistic in our individual challenges. We were both committed to the path, mine being yoga everyday and his being strong enough for chemo, and had faith in our abilities to see our goals through.

By March 5th, I knew there was no turning back for me. I had 4 full days under my belt and knew that if I missed a day and had to start over that I would be upset to miss out on the 4 days I had already completed. And heaven forbid if I missed again making it a habit of starting over, I would be livid. So I decided I was committed no matter what, snow, sleet, rain or shine. No matter what happened in the world, I was doing yoga!

My father had the same outlook as me. He was committed to preparing his body for chemotherapy. His energy was low and body was weak, so over the course of a few weeks he experienced several blood transfusions that would only bring his blood levels up for a few days, but then would go back down.

His blood levels had decreased so bad, he had to be admitted again to the hospital. Still optimistic, he hoped his stay would better prepare him for his scheduled chemotherapy session at the end of the week. No such event took place.

The end of the week, chemo was no longer an option for him at this time. A new change of events revealed that my father’s liver and kidneys had stopped functioning. If over the weekend they didn’t improve, he would have to go into a hospice stage of care.

A few days later, on April 3rd, my dad passed away. It was 34 days from the time of his diagnoses on March 1st. Every day, no matter what, I continued with my practice.

On Saturday, April 14th, I completed my 45th day of continuous yoga. I started out just wanting to see if I could commit to making a change in my life by adding a daily yoga routine to it without giving up on my stated goal. I didn’t give up, I was committed, but I learned so much more.

I was grateful for my 45 days, as it prepared me for change. I found myself learning that my 45 days of yoga was my path to peace and strength that I didn’t know that I could experience in such circumstances experienced with my father with his health and his death. Liv your truth!

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